Wednesday, April 30, 2014

When is a crisp not a crisp?

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do
Benjamin Franklin

I fear I have just joined the ranks of the foolish and penned the following letter.....

Consumer Services Department
Walkers Snack Food Ltd.

PO Box 23

30 April 2014

Dear Sir/Madam,

Firstly, on the whole, I’m one of those consumers who never complain about anything, I think the phrase is “grin and bear it”. However in this instance I must put fingers to keyboard and write this letter.
Due to my husband’s cholesterol levels,  he has been put on a diet – sadly this has meant an end to pies and pastries, and almost resulted in a complete ban on crisps. I can tell you that ours was not a happy household at that point. However, upon further research, I relaxed my hard-line stance and treated the poor man to a multipack of “Walkers Baked Stars Salt & Vinegar Flavour” from Tesco.
Whilst the packaging of this particular variety of Walkers snacks looks as though it is aimed for the younger market, I can assure you they are hugely popular with slightly overweight, slightly high cholesterol suffering men of a certain age.
Sadly, peace did not last for long as, imagine the horror if you can, of reaching into a multipack of crisps and grabbing a packet of lower fat potato heaven, only to find the packet open and the crisps scattered in the bottom of the multipack bag! Not only that, the aforementioned poor man tasted said crisps to see if the packet had just opened as he touched it – this proved even more distressing as they were (apparently) decidedly “soft” as opposed to “crisp”.
I am sure you will agree that this is not the standard which we expect from Walkers and I fear my life will be even more miserable than that of the slightly overweight, slightly high cholesterol suffering man I live with if I don’t let you know how truly disappointed he (and therefore I) am.

I have included the offending packet for stringent testing.

Sincerely yours,

Claire Easson


  1. Hahahahahaha thats a great letter penned in the way only the famous ACE could pen a letter. Loved it. Don't you have Smiths???